"My son"

A card arrived from Thomas' birth mother today . It was exceptionally brief, "Tell my son I love him." She enclosed a $20. bill. Okay. At least I know that the woman has some sort of heart but geesh he's 3 1/2 years old. Where the hell have you been? I'm still so full of anger. The woman makes my blood boil. For 18 months we waited to adopt him. 18 months and she never showed up for one single visit, not one. How could you not see your own child? Court date after court date was rescheduled because she refused to sign over her parental rights yet didn't bother to come to court, ever. What kind of person does that? She was so kind to have consumed 18-20 glasses of vodka each and everyday of her pregnancy (as per her medical records from the hospital) and to have lived in a meth house.

"My son." whatever.

Oh and she has since had two more children. One was a baby boy named Sean who died shorty after birth from a heart defect. It's unknown if her drugging/drinking/lack of prenatal care had anything to do with his illness. It's just so very sad. I have no idea if California let her keep the latest child or not. I do know that she'll never return to Colorado. She's "Red Flagged" here and all future children will be taken at birth. We are still in negotiations to have Thomas meet one of his sibling groups that were adopted out of foster care. I'd love to see them again. Please keep your fingers crossed, the adoptive parents are weary.

T's birth father has a new fiance, he's still technically married to Thomas' mom, and another baby, Nevaeh (Heaven spelled backwards). This makes lucky number #13. Those poor, poor children. He's been out of jail for over a year now and seems to be doing okay. We don't have much contact with him but we know people who run into him occasionally. He sent Thomas a key-chain flashlight for his birthday. I really don't know what to say about that.

All this comes as two of my close friends are suffering devastating losses. L found out that her "Leap Year" baby died two weeks ago and underwent a D & C yesterday. My other friend GM lost her little boy, Gabriel, at sixteen weeks this morning. It's so unbelievably unfair.